It's So Complicated
by Miss Matched
Summary: It's so Complicated, I'm so Frustrated. I wanna hold you close, I wanna push you away, I wanna make you go, I wanna make you stay. Should I say it? Should I tell you how I feel? Oh I want you to know, but then again I don't. It's so complicated.


  


It's So Complicated

  


A Songfic by Miss Matched

"It's So Complicated" the song is by Carolyn Dawn Johnson

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AN: Well I'm proud, this is my first _real_ song fiction. My other ones are just me rambling from the point of view of a character, but this one is written in third person, and actually tells a halfway decent story! Anyhow, read, critique, and enjoy!

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Disclaimer: I own nothing. Boo ya.

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One would have to admit, Miss Rhonda Wellington Loyd could throw a party. Of course, she had enough money to throw 

  


around to make a party a success, but still, that was beside the point. She seemingly threw a party every month, and each 

  


one was billed as the social event of the year. And strangely enough, she was always able to outdo herself every time. 

  


Music blared and people danced. Off to the side was enough food for Harold to stuff himself until he exploded and still 

  


have enough to feed the guests. And of course, is it really a party unless there's a huge punch bowl for Sid to stand next to 

  


and hit on every girl that goes to get a drink? One thing was missing, everyone noted, yet not many of them really cared. 

  


The class bully, whom always sported a pink bow and a wicked attitude, seemed mysteriously absent. "Seemed" being the 

  


operative word; no one had thought to climb up onto the flat cement roof of the spacious Wellington home to gaze upon 

  


the even more spacious sky. If they had, they would have seen their hated bully, though all traces of malice had been 

  


erased on her face, and her ever-clinched fist was an open palm. Back down at the party, the normal faces were there. 

  


Classmates and friends, each in their own little cliques and in their own little corners. The populars, the averages, the 

  


rejects. And in the center was always a beaming Ronda, pausing to speak to each group, and exclaiming to herself or to 

  


others how simply smashing the party was beginning to be. Up on the roof, Helga smirked to herself, noting the irony. The 

  


parties were not for getting people together, but more of defining the social classes. But not like she'd care. There was 

  


really only one thing she cared about. In one little corner, in one little group was her big problem with a big head. 

  


_I'm so scared that the way I feel,  
Is written all over my face  
When you walk into the room, I wanna find a hiding place._

  
  


It was almost funny the way things worked out. Fashionably late and with her best friend at her side, Helga had walked 

  


into the party earlier that evening. "Get me some juice, Phoebs." Helga turned to the raven haired girl, who with a smile, 

  


complied. 

  


"Fetching!" she sang as she walked over to the punch table. Helga looked around, admiring the blue and pink streamers 

  


that had been carefully strewn around the house. Turning back to Phoebe, she bust out laughing. Sid had already taken his 

  


post by the punch bowl. 

  


"Hey you" Sid half-smiled, pouring himself another cup of punch, "you come here often?" Phoebe shook her head, tiredly. 

  


"Sorry, Sid, that isn't going to get the girls to flock to you." 

  


"Hm, what if I used a deeper, sexier voice?" he threw his voice down lower. Phoebe thrust out a cup.

  


"Please fill it." It was more of a command then a question. In a few minutes, she came back to Helga with her drink. 

  


"You keep it, Phoebs, after all you had to go through to get it!" Helga joked. She looked back at Phoebe, who was wide-

  


eyed, and looked almost scared. "What, you're surprised at my generosity?" Phoebe gulped and cleared her throat. 

  


"You know, Rhonda didn't buy any **ice-cream** for this party, did she?" Puzzled for a moment, Helga realized Phoebe was using the code word for Helga's football headed love and enemy, Arnold. 

  


"You're right." Helga said cooly, turning around to see Arnold holding a cup above her head. She grabbed Arnold's shirt 

  


and pulled him close, angerly. "You have five seconds. Four." she counted down. Scared, Arnold dropped the cup. 

  


"It's empty!" he admitted. Helga growled a little, then dropped him. "I'm out of here, mmkay Phoebe?" 

  


"Noting!" Phoebe sang again. 

  


  


_We used to laugh, we used to hug, the way that old friends do._

_But now, a smile and a touch of your hand, _

_Just makes me come unglued. _

_Such a contradiction, do I lie or tell the truth._

_Is it fact or fiction, Oh the way I feel for you._

  


  


So she had gone up onto the roof to gather herself. As much as she wanted to pound a certain football head's face in, she 

  


was in a way proud of him. Pulling a joke on her without regret, well, that took some guts. Evidently he had gone out and 

  


invested in some since the fourth grade. It was funny, really, she had fallen for Arnold simply for him complimenting her 

  


and sharing an umbrella with her one day years and years ago, and yet every day she came to know and appreciate him 

  


more. And still, through this, she was still further and further away from him, the distance increasing as the years went by. 

  


She wanted to just tell him, just get it out of her system, but she couldn't. Too much just seemed at risk to do that, even 

  


now that she was in the 6th grade. And yet, how much longer could she hold out like this? 

  


_So complicated, I'm so frustrated. _

_I wanna hold you close, I wanna push you away, _

_I wanna make you go, I wanna make you stay. _

_Should I say it? Should I tell you how I feel?_

_Oh, I want you to know. _

_But then again I don't. _

_It's so complicated. _

  


  


The stars in the evening sky twinkled seemingly to the beat of the song from inside the house. Rising to her feet slowly, she 

  


decided to suck up her pride and just go inside. "And maybe I can even avoid Arnold" she decided. "Easier said then 

  


done." She wanted more then anything to be near him, but it was just easier sometimes to not be. She looked back once 

  


more at the stars, then turned forward, ready to face everyone again. Down the stairs she strode confidently. "They'd laugh 

  


if they knew your weaknesses" she reminded herself. The music was naturally much louder down there. "Oh great" she 

  


mumbled to herself, seeing that naturally the reason that she didn't want to be down their would be perched at the end of 

  


the stairs with Tall Hair boy. 

  


"Man on MAN, Arnold, Helga didn't care. Come on, the cup was empty. E-M-P-T-Y, must I spell it out?" Gerald was 

  


coaching his friend. "You always talk about her. If I were just listening in, I would think she was your girlfriend. Heck, I'd 

  


think you were married." Helga took in a deep breath as Arnold spoke. 

  


"So? It's not like I care like THAT, but she's my friend, I do care." 

  


_Oh.. just when I think I'm under control, _

_I think I got a grip, _

_Another friend tells me that, I'm always on your lips. _

_They say I'm more than just a friend, they say I must be blind._

_Well, I admit that I've seen you watch me from the corner of your eye._

_Oh, It's so confusing. I wish you'd just confess. _

_But think of what I'd be losin', _

_if your answer isn't yes._

  


  


"'sokay, Arnold, I was just a little peeved." Helga admitted shortly. Arnold turned around quickly at the sound of her 

  


voice. Observant Gerald arched an eyebrow, but in turn said nothing. Flashing her a world class smile, Arnold climbed up 

  


a few stairs to get closer to Helga. 

  


"You're not mad?" 

  


"Naw, paste-for-brains" she kidded "I've done worse to you, now haven't I?" Arnold laughed.

  


"Really, now? Well, what do you know?!" 

  


  


"More then you do" she nearly replied, but held her tongue. Instead, she rolled her eyes. "Must you always look on the 

  


bright side?" 

  


  


"Food for thought;" Arnold winked, going down the stairs with Helga, "If you always look to the sun, you'll never see 

  


shadows." 

  


  


"More food for thought" Helga countered, "Look at the sun too long and you'll go blind." They reached the bottom of the 

  


stairs. 

  


"Hey, now." 

  


"That's what you get for getting all philosophical on me." Helga teased.

  


"Point made." He turned around to look at Gerald, who was by now deep in conversation with Phoebe. "Let's leave those 

  


two alone for now." He suggested. 

  


"Um... okay..." Helga said nervously. She knew that he wasn't saying that to be alone with her, yet she was still a bit 

  


nervous. Arnold took her hand and dragged her into the middle of the dance floor. 

  


  


_So complicated I'm so frustrated, _

_I wanna hold you close, I wanna push you away,_

_I wanna make you go, I wanna make you stay. _

_Should I say it? Should I tell you how I feel?_

_Oh I want you to know, but then again I don't, _

_It's so complicated._

  


"Hey, hey, take it easy, bucko!" Helga fought. "Maybe I don't wanna dance!" 

  


Arnold shrugged. "You don't have to." 

  


"But you dragged me!" 

  


"And you can leave, now can't you?" 

  


"I thought I was the bully." Helga huffed, though she was really elated. "Fine, if the football head wants to dance, we'll 

  


dance." 

  


"I never said anything about dancing with you." Arnold teased, and Helga's face fell. "I just implied it." Like a gentleman, he 

  


held out his hand. "May I have this dance?" 

  


"I thought you'd never ask." 

  


  


_Oh, I hate it. 'Cuz I've waited. _

_So long for someone like you _

_Oh, what do I do. _

_Oh should I say it? _

_Should I tell you how I feel? _

_I want you to know,but then again I don't._

  


"Wait, hang on" Helga halted as they danced by a few people. "Last time I danced with you, I ended up in a pool." 

  


  


Ronda, dancing with Harold (at arms length, mind you) over heard that and laughed. "Dance her on up to the third level 

  


where our Jacuzzi is, Arnold!" 

  


"Well, last time I danced with you, Helga, you were dressed like Helen Keller." Arnold joked. "Things change." 

  


"And people?" Helga interjected with a smirk.

  


"And people." he confirmed. The song was ending, Helga realized, and she may never have a more perfect chance to tell 

  


Arnold how she felt about him. As the song began to fade, she smiled, knowing the perfect words to say. 

  


  


"You know what, Arnold? You're okay" 

  


"Really? I'm winning you over!" He smiled. Helga pulled away from him just before the last notes of the song sounded. "So 

  


we're officially friends now?" Arnold asked carefully as everyone around them began to move away. She play punched 

  


him on the shoulder. 

  


"As if we weren't before in some odd, twisted way?" she asked.

  


_It's so complicated... _

_It's so complicated... _

_It's so complicated... _

_Ohh.._

  


"Yeah," Arnold nodded as they walked back over to Phoebe and Gerald, who had been dancing alone in the corner of the 

  


room. "Hey, I always wondered why you did the things you did sometimes. The blind thing on April Fools, for one." 

  


Helga shrugged, a playful smile on her lips. "Dunno," she teased, "Some things are so complicated." 

  


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End file.
